When it comes to talking about personal stuff I go silent, I cannot talk- words do not come out. If someone asks me how I feel I can’t describe it, I sometimes cannot answer questions and the person on the other side gets sick of this and annoyed so they move on. Really I would like for someone to stick with me as I struggle to tell them, I feel stupid telling others how I feel as I know they are stupid thoughts that I should not have as it takes me a LONG time to get there I just need to be pushed!
When I do go I get asked if there is anything I want to talk about, I usually say no but really there is but I feel stupid bringing it up, this gets me nowhere! I lie so I don’t have to get too deep on subjects such as depression, suicide, self harm as I feel like an idiot!!
Hey. I experience much of the same things. It's hard to open up to people when you feel so crappy inside. It takes me a long time to formulate responses, as well, and they always seem stupid. I'm always criticizing myself too: "Why did I say that? That was stupid. I should have said this."
ReplyDeleteAnyway, try to be easy on yourself. Take care.
- Mike
I wish I had someone to talk about the deep issues of my life. I always feel like no one wants me, I want to talk about depression, feeling empty, wanting to die.
ReplyDeleteI want to not feel so alone. People ask how I am doing, and I feel like I need to lie, too. It's because we lack confidence. We need to learn to see that what we have to say is important. But of course, this is not easy.
It would be nice if poeple wouldn't just give up on us so easily. You take care. :)